Making Yourself A Priority

I started running when I was 14 years old. I ran all though high school and college and finished marathons throughout my 20’s and into my early 30’s. I continue to run today both for my health and for my enjoyment and eventually hope to finish my 10th marathon. From the very beginning though, I was surrounded by the running community, which meant I was also surrounded by women who train even after starting a family. This was something I respected, grew inspiration from, and assumed I would do the same when it came time for me to start having my family.

After my daughter was born, I followed the examples that these women provided. With a goal of participating in a race, I got back into running with training runs. I felt this was the best way to remove excuses and I had something that I could work towards. I would place my daughter in a jogging stroller because I was also insistent of making my health a priority and wanted to set an example. After my son was born, he joined his sister in the stroller. It was after I launched my own business as a running coach that I really struggled with balance and making my workouts part of a daily routine. On those days where I had little sleep, became too busy planning schedules for my clients, or there was a big pile up in household chores, my workout was often the first thing to be pushed to the side. The challenge was then to mentally convince myself that maintaining a workout schedule was not just some optional routine that was last on a priority list. It was a daily necessity in making me a better person. I had to set an example to my clients as I had already launched my business as a running coach and personal trainer, my focus being clients who had never run but always wanted to be runners. Often, my client is a mom with little ones like myself, something I could easily relate to. I then decided to use my voice as a business owner, a mom, and someone obsessed with running to remind other moms it is ok to find time every day to focus on yourself.

I often hear all the reasons why it is so difficult to fit in your training as a mom. And in all honesty, I have experienced most of them. I had the infant who did not sleep (when I say infant, I can honestly say it took until my son was over 3 years-old to finally develop good sleep habits, which meant my own sleep patterns suffered). I deal with the crazy schedules of school drop offs, pickups, and activities. The point of me sharing these experiences is that we have all been through it. There are most definitely unique challenges that are just tied to being moms. Adding workouts that would benefit you, your health, and most likely your sanity is not an easy task. But with some brain storming, and some tips and tricks, you can still find that balance and help make yourself a priority again.

The question always arises - how? The first piece of advice I have for you is a mental exercise rather than a physical one. You just need to realize that your own needs also do matter. Too often making this decision comes with mom guilt, something that in my opinion needs to go away. When working on making yourself a priority, one of the most important things you need to ask yourself is “am I a better mother when I take care of myself”? Dig deep and you will realize your answer is yes. When your baby is first born, you are told to sleep when he or she sleeps, eat when you can, and take care of your body so you are not running on empty. But for you to be able to provide for your little(s) you cannot be running on fumes. Being able to work out for the sake of your health and sanity makes you a better you, which in turn will show through with your parenting. If you need to, put a note up in a place you will see it every single day.

Once you realize that you are a priority, you next need to figure out how to schedule your workout into your day. Start small – how many days a week do you feel you can commit to? Try to make it a goal of three workouts a week to start with. You need to create a habit for yourself. Over time, the habit will become a routine. Once you are easily fitting those workouts into your life, you will start to look forward to those workout days. And then you will be able to add in more workouts. Some weeks it may be harder to fit in workouts but stick with your minimum that you started with. It is much harder to stay motivated when you completely stop for too long.

Need help staying on track? Set yourself a goal. This goal does not have to have anything to do with weight loss. In all honesty, I usually recommend that weight not be a major goal for anyone. The scale does not tell the whole story. Instead, choose another goal to work towards. Are you a runner? Sign up for a race that you know you need to train for – not just one you can run without fully training. Into spinning? Great! See how many rides you can get in – set yourself a goal. Is it 50? 100? Once again, something to work towards. Another great way to stay on track is by having an accountability partner, someone who will hold you to your word and not let you off the hook when you are slacking. Will your best friend four states away call you out if you don’t check in on workout days? Find that person and ask them to be an accountability partner with you!

Now when do you fit in your workouts? That will depend. If it is important that your workout time be your own personal time, look at early morning, late evenings, or even nap time if your children are little enough. If your children are a little older, have an activity box put together that only comes out when you are doing your workouts. It can be a special coloring book, different markers, new cars etc. For biking and running – get a stroller or bike trailer for the kids to go in during your workouts. It may not be as easy as going alone but remember that you are also teaching them by example. Just bring stroller-only toys and lots of snacks. Do you have even older kids? Get them involved in your workouts. It does not have to be every day and could only be once a week. Why not have the entire family take on fitness goals together? Go for a weekly walk, bike ride, or hike together as a family.

Have you ever gotten the main part of your workout in but ran out of precious time to fit in a stretch or core work? Get it in when you are watching a TV show or listening to a podcast. Take the time to stretch while a meal is cooking if you need to. If you can do more than one workout in a day, make each of them short and look for options like a 15-minute HIIT (high-intensity interval training) workout in the morning and a short yoga routine or strength training later in the day.

Moms must be masters at balancing multiple schedules, multitasking, and getting everyone else in the family through the day. The problem is they can forget they also are a priority and need to pencil in their own time. Once you have decided that your health and fitness are also a matter of importance, you need to make sure you schedule it in just like you do with laundry, household chores, kids’ extracurricular activities, and so on. Yes, life happens and sometimes you need to move schedules around, but make sure the exercise routines are not the ones being scratched out. Start with a realistic commitment and build steadily. If you go too extreme in the beginning, you are going to get frustrated and quit. Remember also that your goal is to make this a habit, not just for you but for your whole family.

Your workouts should just be considered a normal part of everyone’s day, so you not asked to sacrifice that time for someone else. Find your accountability – it can be a friend, family member, a race, a challenge you set for yourself or even a Facebook group. But find a way to stay accountable so you stay on track. That small amount of time you dedicate to yourself to improve your health pays dividends in every other part your life.